Why aren't you a Trump supporter?
12.06.2025 08:38

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that
I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”
When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability
Are there really people who still believe the Earth is flat?
I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes
I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”
If someone works for me, I actually pay them
What do dreams about dead people mean?
I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes
I don’t watch or listen to advertising
I understand how hurricane paths work
Does eating bread before bed make you fat? If so, why?
When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP
I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink
I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard
I can read
I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality
I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP
I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”
I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane
I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet
Jordan Ott hiring strengthens questions on Suns’ decision-making tree - Arizona Sports
I don’t buy bullshit
I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity
I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup
Natural Tick Repellent Found—on Donkey Skin - Newser
I can count
I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”
I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”
I have complete contempt for fakery
I took the same Oath and took it seriously
I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones
I actually pay taxes
I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”
I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write
Walmart Nintendo Switch 2: it was in stock and will be back next week - The Shortcut | Matt Swider
I know who the president of Turkey really is
authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday
I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center
I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.
I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t
Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.
It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter
I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight
I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”
It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms
I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t
I don’t cotton to rapists
I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light
I have complete contempt for traitorism
I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t
I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”
Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?
I have an acute aversion to scumbags
I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened
I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”
I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee
I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is
A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y
Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:
I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”
I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions
I see through liars
I have a reading level above third grade